If you and I met up for a cup of coffee and decided to catch up on life, what would you tell me? I’m willing to bet that the major turning points in your life would come rushing into your mind, making it seem like so much has happened in so little time.
When I think back on the last few years of my life, I tend to recall several major turning points as well. But the one thing that stands out to me the most is the waiting. I seem to always be waiting. For the next move, the next relationship milestone, the next degree, the next job. It’s always something. And I don’t think I’m the only one. This waiting game is a common experience that many of us are ashamed to admit to. Why is that?
I’m currently doing a lot of waiting. With each passing day, each submitted job application, I feel the pressure and anxiety building. Unemployment is like the ultimate waiting downer.
But what if it doesn’t have to be? I’ve begun to realize that waiting isn’t necessarily negative…it’s just the mentality in which myself and most of my friends approach this phase of life. Why not try to view this waiting game as an opportunity to enjoy my own company and the rare abundance of time.
The realization that I negatively approach waiting didn’t come quickly, but I can pinpoint one particular moment when the lightbulb went off.
This past weekend I was catching up with a girlfriend at the beach and I remember her saying something to the effect of “enjoy unemployment as long as possible, real jobs are draining.” I thought this was particularly ironic, considering that she had spent a good portion of 2013/2014 searching for a job and was very impatient to get one. Her own unemployment waiting game seemed like misery and torture. But when I think about her words, regardless of whether or not she was being serious, something just sort of clicks in my head.
So many of us view unemployment as something to be ashamed of. It’s like the longer we go without finding a job, the more of a failure we appear to be. God knows this isn’t the case, but it definitely feels like it is. Instead of letting the judgement of society and my own mental devil discourage me, maybe I should approach this differently. Maybe this phase that I’m in is another aspect of one of my more important life goals: to redefine a type of success that doesn’t depend on your job title or salary.
It’s common to hear from people nearing the end of their lives that we should enjoy the moments we’re in and not take them for granted. It’s one of those easier said than done situations, but think of what could be gained if we managed to appreciate our current moments?
I, for one, think that my anxiety levels would subside. Just a little. I want to be able to look back on this time in my life and not immediately recall anxiety and feelings of failure. When i catch someone up on my life, I don’t want to only recall the day when I finally get a job offer. I want to remember enjoying pool days and pleasure reading and sleeping in. I want to remember enjoying the process of getting my house together. All it’ll take is a change of mindset.
Life As Morgan Knows It 